15 Things Only People Who Live in the NT Will Understand

The NT is definitely a special part of Australia. Not only for the people that visit, but also for those lucky enough to call it home. If you’ve ever lived in the NT, you’d know there are – let’s say – a few unique things about the culture that might be considered strange to those who visit.

For your amusement, we’ve listed 15 of the unique-iest things about the NT guaranteed to put a smile on the dial of those in the know, and surprise those that aren’t.

15 Things You Can Only Know Living in the NT 

1. You Know What “Gammon” Means and Use it Liberally

gammon-brus

The NT has a language all of its own and the vernacular can often make you feel like you’re in another country.

To help you out, here are a few select translations that will hopefully get you by:

  • Gammon: A falsification of the facts at hand
  • Ngeeeeeeeeh don’t be gammon brus!: Oh come on my friend, don’t be like that
  • That’s gammon brus: No, I don’t believe that to be true, sir – or – That’s really something I would prefer not to be a part of, good day sir
  • I pranged my treadly and went dôp brus over the handlebars: I had an unfortunate accident whilst riding my bicycle
  • You think you budju, look: I believe you consider yourself more attractive than you in fact are.
  • She’s a budju, look: My word, she is absolutely breath-taking!

 2. You Know How Quickly it Can Go From Stinking Hot to Freezing Cold

The desert seasons of the NT’s centre can sometimes see stinking hot 40° days switch abruptly into WTF who left the fridge open 2° nights.

This is mostly inconvenient when visiting a friend’s house, as the sudden temperature change can leave you stranded in a pair of shorts, while your mate selfishly ruggs up in his trackies and Ugg boots, the gammon frick.

3. Kangaroos are More Alpha Than You

The Roos in the NT aren’t like the Roos you’ve seen in the Zoo. These bad boys are the real deal and their pec and arm muscles will put you and any fake tanned, juiced up, teeth whitened, 20 something floating ‘round the Gold Coast to shame.

It’s a sad truth fellas; Big Red Roos are the original “Mr Steal Yo Girl” and are way more alpha than you’ll ever be.

 4. You Can Have a Boat Race Without Water if You Believe You Can

If you thought the geographical limitations of a desert landscape would be enough to hinder an NT naval enthusiast, think again, as each year these champions find a way to enjoy a boat race without the need of redundant overrated water!

All that’s needed is beer and a little NT know how!

5. Everything You Now Own is Red

Have you bought a nice new blue car recently? Guess what, it’s red now.

And that fancy cute red poodle of yours, how’s he going?

Yep, due to the red sands of the desert, and the winds, everything you now own will eventually transform from a boring whatever colour to a nice bright sandy red.

Don’t waste your time trying the preserve the whiteness of your car or your sheets as they dry on the line, just accept the red fate and pretend everything you own is a Ferrari – YEEEEEWWW, FERRARI!

 6. Jurassic Park Exists

perentie

Yep, it’s not uncommon to see a croc on the side of the road in some parts of the NT.

It’s probably not the best idea to snap a selfie with or ride one of these prehistoric bonecrushers, but you can always be gammon brus and say you did to your mates – who’s going to know?

 7. Moto X is life

NT-moto-X

If you don’t know about Crusty Demons, Kwakas, CRM 250, KTM SX, XC HOHOHFy89 or HJDFGDJDFKJKJD%^#%#^# you’re probably not going to be much for conversation in regards rural NT’s number 1 pastime.

8. Shopping Centres have the Cheapest Aircon

Probably the number 1 reason you’d ever see people in a shopping centre in the NT, en masse, isn’t the bargains or the chance to get a picture with Santa at Christmas time.

No, it’s most likely sanctuary from the stinking summer heat. And seriously, why jack up a sky-high electricity bill in your own home when Casurina or Fordy’s has their AC pumping anyway?

9. Tap Water is Purer than the Virgin Mary

NT-tap-water

If you’ve ever played cricket in the NT summer, then you definitely know NT tap water is the duck nuts, especially in Alice Springs!

Wrapping your laughing gear directly around the backyard hose or a tap at the local oval is like drinking nourishing ambrosia from the teat of a Greek god.

Just make sure you let it run a little bit first, that H2O can be hot AF to start with.

10. The Italians and Greeks are More Italian and Greek Than the Italians and Greeks in Italy and Greece

One of the most surprising things for people new to the NT is the dense population of Greeks and Italians.

The Italians and Greeks who moved to the NT did so a very long time ago and have maintained their hardcore homeland heritage, unchanged since the era they left.

Bonus benefits; you’ll never go hungry if you have an Italian or Greek mate in the NT you Malaka.

11. Darwin is the UN

There are more than Greeks and Italians making up the NT’s multicultural population. Darwin is also rich in other international cultures and has often been described as the mini UN.

Fun Fact – Many Darwinites would have learned 50 ways to say f*&ck in other languages before they actually learn it in English. No bull, brus!

12. The Beach in Darwin is One of God’s Sick Twisted Jokes

darwin-crocodile-beach

Do you know how unfair it would be to live in a place known for high heat and humidity in the summer, only to have a beach where crocodiles and jelly fish also swim? Well, you would if you lived in Darwin. Why God, whyyyyyyyy??????

Luckily, man created public pools and Darwin has a great selection to choose from. Pheeeeeeeeeeewwwww!

13. Going to Adelaide is Pretty Much the Same as Backpacking Overseas

Where’s Macca these days?

Didn’t ya hear? He’s been down in Adelaide for a couple of weeks.

Lucky bloke, he’s bloody worldly he is.

It’s true; the square city of Adelaide is known as THE most common holiday destination for those in Alice Springs and the surrounding areas.

And when they return to town, they’re welcomed back at the pub to fill their mates in on their tales from abroad.

14. In the Summer You Never Walk Outside the House Without Shoes, EEEEver!

NT-hot-sand

Unless you’ve got crocodile skin feet, walking around outside in the summer without shoes is pretty stupid, and you only need one soul searing lesson to find out why.

15. Everywhere in Australia is “Down South” When You Live in Darwin

To Darwinites, anyplace outside of their beloved land is known as “Down South.” Doesn’t matter if you come from the very tip of Cape York or even Japan, you’re from bloody down south!

 

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